Tales Of Thursday

The incident happened with Mr Pankhawala, the accountant,  many years ago when he was in his early thirties. He was travelling from Patna to Calcutta in a modest carriage of a modest train. Mr Pankhawala, who always chose the side chair/berth on his journeys, being the quiet adventurer that he was, had acquired one that day too. He had slipped into sleep while he sat, elbow perched on the window-pane, palm supporting his slightly egg-shaped, clean shaven, long eared face that rocked with the hum-drum of the train, looking into the darkness outside, watching the endless stream of dark trees and dark fields and sometimes an occasional hut or canal pass by.

Somewhere later that night he had woken up, unconsciously aware that the train had stopped, as one often does during railway trips and looked out of the window. The platform was of a tiny halt named Chholapur. 'Curse you, modest trains!', he had said in his head, still half-asleep. Looking at the station name-plate, his thoughts had veered to the memories of his last rail trip when he had eaten Chholey heartily for dinner and when his late night bowel movements had alerted many a fellow passengers from deep sleep and set a 3 month old baby on a fierce howl of horror for the whole night.

He had been so busy engrossed in his not-so delightful memories that he almost didn't notice when a very young but a very pale man arrived at the seat opposite him. 

"52...53...54, ah! here...", he said sitting down. He had long hair, a square jaw, shiny eyes and a three day stubble. He was wearing a red and blue checkered coat whose check matched that of his luggage-case that he was carrying and which he made no attempt at shoving in below the chair or somewhere else out of the way. He looked quite bright and awake for that hour of night.

"Hello Sir, Thursday..", he said noticing Mr Pankhawala noticing him.

"Hello, its Tuesday actually"

"Oh no no mister, that's my name, Thursday Kumar"

"Ohh, okay! I'm Subhadeb" said Mr Pankhawala."So, you were born on Thursday.." added he as an afterthought, half stating, half asking.

"Err.. no. It's because the wine's half rate on Thursdays near our place"

"Excuse me... what?"

"I said the drinks, you know wine and stuff, are half the normal rate on Thursdays near our place, has always been. Ever since my great-granddad's time"

The accountant became fully awake at that and cursed his luck to have always come across only such people. He decided not to bore into the topic much more, for the better and looked out. The train had started moving. Noticing Mr Pankhawala solemnly disconnected, the young man too shifted his attention outdoors.

"It's going to be sunny tomorrow, and there'll be a thunderstorm", piped up Thursday after a few moments, dreamily. The accountant now looked more amused than confused, but remained quiet. He ran the statement over and over in his head, amusing himself and thinking, 'what a clown, thinks he's the weatherman', but when he could no longer hold it inside, he said "There's nothing but black outside. There's no wind and you can't even see the sky from here. How can you say how the weather will be tomorrow?"

"Ahh, I just know. You know, I know it from up-close". Mr Pankhawala gave a smart smile at this and decided just to nod.

"You know, I was struck by lightening once." Thursday moved on, "it was a fine day, and I was crossing the farm. Then, all of a sudden the weather changed and then the thunder started and before I knew anything, one of them came down and landed right on my head and went through my whole body and out it came through my feet and into the ground"

The accountant held back his emotions. While he decided whether to laugh aloud or clap on the young man's storytelling skills, he noticed a boy on the upper bunk diagonally across from him looking at him, probably more interested in his reaction than the bearded storyteller. So he quenched his laughter like a sober man and uttered a simple, 'Oh yeah? Okay!', in return.

Seeing such a low response, the man with the checkered coat excused himself to get some tea from a pantry guy he just spotted in the next compartment. The accountant politely refused when the man asked if he would like some. He went out and was back within 2 minutes. The state of his tea made Mr Pankhawala glad that he didn't agree to have one. "Your tea looks cold" he said. "Ahh, I drink my tea cold", replied the young man. 

"To tell you the truth mister, I don't like tea very much in the first place.I'll have my drink any day over any fine exotic tea you might offer, that is, if there is one" 

"Hmm"

"I was shot once for it, you know". The accountant let out a chuckle before he could hold it.

"No, true sir, I make no jokes. You see, I once went to the local pub and asked for a drink for half the price because I only had that much amount of money. So he told me to sod off. Then I told him that since I am Thursday, I must always get a drink half the ask. But the guy started swearing at me and I got angry at his swearing. I grabbed an empty bottle and made a swing and hit him. He started bleeding, made a furious face , took out his local pistol and shot me in the stomach. But like a miracle, the bullet went in and out the other way and didn't confuse my insides at all." The accountant was listening intently.

"I was good as a jumping horse within a week"

'The lad does make good stories' thought Mr Pankhawala. He decided that he might as well throw a complement. "Poor, bullet", he said "it mustn't have known who it was up against eh'." and made a good laugh at his own joke. "Tell me, did ever a snake bite you and died itself, did it?" chuckled the accountant playfully mocking him.

"Oh come mister, you are making fun of me. But it's okay, I don't mind. It's good humour." said the bearded one "However ... what if I tell you that this one time, I bit a snake and it died!" 

The accountant had to try very hard not to burst out laughing and make a scene similar to his last journey. "Okay!" he said sniggering "How? Pray tell."

"Well, what happened mister was, not long ago I was in my village, sleeping at my gate in the open and that venomous reptile slithered out of the farm nearby and up my bed, on me. It wrapped itself around my left arm and woke me up. I lifted myself slowly staring into its eyes. It stared back at me and I brought my right hand from behind it and caught hold of its head. As I did, it started squeezing my hand very bad, stopping all the blood and making my bones hurt. I tried all I could to get it loose free my hand, but when it didn't, I lifted it's head and bit it down its neck and chewed hard. I chewed and chewed until it was cut in two and then I threw the head side away. It withered some and then died after a while."

The accountant wasn't feeling amused this time. He was confused, instead. The story seemed so believable to him this time. In fact on second thoughts, all of them appeared believable to him now. 'They are funny and absurd but maybe they are true', he thought. He let out a faint 'Hmm', which was more an answer to himself than a comment on Thursday's story. Time passed by. 

"My station is about to come", Thursday acknowledged dreamily. 

"Already?", let out the accountant.

"Yeah, about 10 minutes"

"Hmm", he looked out of the window first, watching dark trees fly by, then back in around the compartment at his fellow passengers, sleeping, dreaming. The boy across was still finding something amusing about him as he kept stealing glances every now and then, brow perched. The modest train had already started slackening it's pace, indicating that the station was near.

"So.. Thursday.. it was, you know, nice to meet you. And sorry if I appeared mocking you earlier, but I think I believe all of your stories now."

"Good to hear that sir", said the young man smiling.

"You don't have any more stories, do you?", joked the accountant

"Err, yes. I do in fact. One more."

"Oh please tell! Before your station comes"

"Are you sure, I don't know if you'll like it much"
"Sure. Why not try and then see?"

"Okay mister." he smiled "You see last winter, I was standing at this platform, the one which is coming right now, waiting for the train to arrive. There was a kid playing a few feet away from me. I was looking at some workmen heave big boxes on a goods trolley, getting bored. Then, just as the train came in sight near the platform, the labourers somehow lost hold of the trolley and it started rolling fast towards the kid who stood busy looking at the incoming train. I ran towards the kid just in time to push him out of the trolley's way, but it wheeled on one of my feet and I lost my balance and fell on the tracks. Before I had time to climb back up, the train came and  ran all over me."

"Oh, come on now mate, that's just ridiculous!", cried the accountant at this joke of Thursday's. "It only goes so far. If that were the case, you would've died for sure. You can't claim to survive that.."

Thursday smiled, then said "But I never said that I survived".

The station had already arrived. Thursday stood up, grabbed his luggage, said "Goodbye mister, it was nice to meet you", walked to the door and ... vanished.

- - - - - - - - - -

This post was a part of a meme, Theandric Thursday. Its a fortnightly feature hosted by Ashna Banga.

The dictionary definition of 'Theandric' is 'Relating to the joint agency of divine and human nature'.

1. I know that it's a Friday and not a Thursday, still I feel it's the kind of story which so much exemplifies the meme, so that's why I put the post under it.

2. I didn't put the phrase 'Theandric Thursday' in the title because then it would've given away the suspense.